although its mothers day 

this is a blog that goes out to my dad.

i wish he realized that the 20 years he fucked up

isnt gonna come back

yes..my parents are still together

and my dad has lived with me my whole life

but he was never there.

it was always me and my mom making excuses

as to why he wouldnt be making an appearance to family functions

and the only thing he would do for me

is put money in my wallet

and never tell me i couldnt do something

he just tried winning me over by being the good guy

he failed.

and every time him and my mom fight

he tells me how sorry he is for being a shitty father

but when everything is ok with my mom again

nothing about his actions change

im 20 now

and im over it

i could only recall one time we truly hung out

and i think its stupid that he wants to be right with me

just cause hes in the shit house with my mom

he is completely obsessed with her

and it disgust me

as sad as it is...

my mom could do something fucked up

and i would still be on her side

yes hes my father

but hes never been my dad